by KWADWO ALFAJIRI SHAH

i look around and see happy
chess pieces
content moving the way
the king commands
or
queens
moving blissfully how they wish

why can’t i move?
why can’t i move?

in preordained patterns
waltzing away with no worries
collecting a coin
bought with blood—
by specie, spilling the same
a careless sanguinity

or otherwise breaking
free
shifting away from the shame that’s
shut in and shuts me in
trusting the One to dress me
like the lilies of the field
whirling wistlessly in the wind

instead im here
trapped between the two
too knowing to be happy
but too scared to be free

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Alfajiri is just a nigga trying to make it through life. They graduated from Howard University with Bachelors degrees in Afro-American studies and, regrettably, economics. At the moment, they make their living working a government job as a research assistant, but they are searching for ways to be free.